You Are On Our Turf Now, King

It is not easy writing these articles.  You have to watch CNN and bitch about what you saw until 4 AM and you have a 8 AM meeting the next morning and now it is your turn to bring donuts and you are on a diet and you feel bad getting donuts but you have to keep the tradition going because you don’t want to be “Dan the Guy that Didn’t Bring Donuts.”  It takes a lot of work.  But sometimes life gives you lemons, some sugar, a glass of water, a lemon squeezer, a strong guy named Dave, and a full glass of lemonade.  This is one of those times for us.  Congressman Steve King recently tweeted some harsh comments about babies.  Congressman Steve King just stepped right into Moon Base Party territory.

Steve King is a U.S. Representative from Iowa, a state we at the Moon Base Party do not officially recognize outside of presidential primaries.  He has been accused of being racist on a number of occasions.  Rep. King has vocalized his support for Dutch far-right leader Geert Wilders.  Wilders is basically the Dutch equivalent of Donald Trump, and by the time you read this, he might be the new Prime Minister of the Netherlands.  He is strongly anti-immigrant and Islamophobic.  He wants to ban the Quran in the Netherlands.  He is also a hero for Rep King.

On Sunday, King tweeted his support for Wilders in the upcoming election.

Steve King: “Wilders understands that culture and demographics are our destiny. We can’t restore our civilization with somebody else’s babies.”  This is a retweet of a cartoon showing Wilders trying to hold back the green “tide” of Islam from crashing over the wall of “Western Civilization.”  King’s comments have caused a lot of outrage online from both Democrats and Republicans.  In the face of this outrage, King apologized for this comments online.  Just kidding.  He doubled-down, urged Americans to keep birthrates up, said different ethnic groups contribute more to society, and expressed his desire for a society “so homogenous that we look a lot the same.”  King seemed to be fighting two powerful internal forces: the urge to save face before his 2018 reelection campaign and the temptation to just go all in and blurt out all of his inner racist monologue.

We will let the news pundits ridicule him over the racism and xenophobia angles on this.  And there is a lot to go on there, including believing white people contribute more than other sub-groups, claiming Arabs cannot assimilate into American culture, openly supporting racial profiling in law enforcement, criticizing Obama over his middle name, voting against aid for Hurricane Katrina victims, and displaying the confederate flag on his office desk despite Iowa’s alignment with the Union during the Civil War.  We could also talk about his hatred for eco-friendly light bulbs, his bill to recognize Christmas and Christianity, his fight to keep Harriet Tubman off the $20 bill, his questionable voting record on animal cruelty, his misquoting of Newton’s laws of motion, his statements that global warming will help farmers grow more corn, his bad jokes about vegetarians, his really really really bad analogies, or his unawareness of how sex works.  Controversy is not new for King.  Truthfully, as others have noted, King is a run-of-the-mill, racist, old, white guy from middle America who can only get erect whenever anyone mentions his name, good or bad.  This is likely the only reason he ran for public office.  He will feed off of this for awhile longer, maybe making a few more statements about race while saying “I’m not racist, but …” and declaring he wants a more homogeneous society.  He will furiously tug at his little controversy boners and then drop off the radar for a while when Trump sends out another Twitter rant or Selena Gomez has a pregnancy scare.

Game on Creepy Gremlin

Instead of all of that, we want to highlight the bigger concern that emerged from his tweet: King is anti-baby.

The Official Moon Base Party of the United States of America is very pro-baby.  No one is more pro-baby then us.  We are pro-binky and pro-nap time.  We don’t just think embryos have the right to life; we think they have the right to vote!  Stick a ballot up there and let’s make sure their little voices from their undeveloped voice boxes are heard.  So when we read King’s tweet, we knew we had to step in.

King, what do you have against babies?  You could have said something like “We can’t restore our culture with other cultures.”  It is dumb, but it sounds catchy.  Instead, he chose to attack the babies of immigrants in particular.  The babies cannot choose to come to this country (maybe they could if we let them vote!).  It is unfair to attack babies for their parents’ choices.

Besides, what makes white American babies better than other babies?  Just look at this multicultural baby assortment.  Look at them and tell me they aren’t all adorable.  Whether they are black, white, brown, or tan, all babies are cute and smelly.  This transcends cultures.

You can do better than Kate Moss

This does not stop at just “someone else’s babies.”  King hates babies, period.  He may want laws to protect life at the moment of conception and he may oppose federal coverage for contraceptives because he is obsessed with maintaining “replacement rates” for white people.  However, King also wants to dismantle public schools, remove calorie restrictions on school lunches, get rid of mom and baby’s healthcare before a replacement is created, cut food stamps to poor babies and their families, and deny tax benefits to gay parents.  You cannot want more babies and then give them no financial support or a proper system for them to grow … unless of course you hate babies and you just want them to suffer.

In the end, it doesn’t matter if it is your babies, my babies, our babies, his/her baby, their babies, or someone else’s babies, we need all the babies we can get.  Why?  Because we have to build a moon base!

Moon Base Scorecard™

Put that baby downThe Moon Base Scorecard™ gives our ratings of elected officials.  It gives our supporters a helpful guide for making decisions like who to vote for in the school board elections or whether to stock up on toilet paper.

Personally Traits
: 4chan’s grandpa
John Boehner’s Verdict: He is an asshole.
Love for White Babies: 0
Love for Non-white Babies: -10
Support for the Moon Base Initiative: Sad face
Overall Score: F-



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